29. May 2019 · Comments Off on IKON Pass announcement for 2019/2020 Season; · Categories: Blatant Utah tourism propaganda

Detachable 8’s right to the top!!

The editor says Fuck That Noise!

PPPC

Oh wow; continuing with the “PC used to be a ski town” theme. #1 issue in PC is traffic congestion and highly limited parking. Now to ensure your industrial ski experience is the worst ever, Vail has decided to sell off the parking lots at PCMR!

At the PPPC we see this shitshow/clusterfuck everyday in the winter from the quiet confines of the back of the White Pine touring 5k which loops just below this lot. This lot fills up to capacity by no later than 830a everyday during the ski season. Then the overflow parks anywhere they can find packing the town over the brim with cars.

I guess the Vail Parking Fairies will just contruct a giant parking garage like the one that already exists in Vail, Co and costs 30 clams a day plus your $200 or so rack rate ticket and at least $100 for a burger and beer on mountain.

With a massive amount of hoops to already jump through just to get on the mountain, this adds yet another layer of annoyance to get out and do something that is supposed to be fun.

Of course the tourists will probably love it as they are known to love breathing in each others farts all day on shuttle’s.

PCMR barely qualifies as anything more than a terrain park/tourist trap resort anyways so here at the PPPC we really don’t give a crap how bad industrial skiing gets being over that over crowded nonsense for at least a decade now but it would be nice to be able to find a parking spot to get into the office since this type of money grab bs just pushes the parking into every other lot in PC thats on a ski bus line. Plus this lot has become THE central hub for PC mtb’ing spring through fall until the industrial ski giant reopens for the season.

Don’t look to the giants for a solution as the only thing that talks in Packed City is MONEY.

The Editor,

PPPC


https://unofficialnetworks.com/2019/03/25/park-city-local-not-happy/

HAHAHAHAHA! What LOCALS!?!

The last locals moved out of PC 15 years ago as the private plane, “PC Family” vanity plates on the latest Lexus SUV crowd took over and they are all in their beach homes by 4/7 anyway.

Looks like someone thinks Park City is actually still a ski town!

LOL!

The Editor,

PPPC

If you slide on one of the BIG mountains in the west you have probably noticed a really bad smell this season that might only have been a faintly bad smell in seasons past.

Jackson Hole, Snowbird, and Alta locals have reportedly been hit the worst by this phenomena with locals reporting increased incidence of skiing triggered migraines, just trying to get to the resort-road rage, and difficulty breathing in crowded liftlines.

What is the cause of this malaise gentle reader? Look no further than the industrial skiing giants and their conglomerate passes;

Ikon Pass

https://www.jhnewsandguide.com/news/town_county/article_74e0e79c-ed83-5a4f-b5b6-408b365126b0.html

This massive influx of tourists has created highly dangerous Tourist Fart Air bubble/inversions over these resorts! It has also been reported that TFA was at levels deemed unhealthy for at risk individuals this season over Presidents day and MLK day weekends!

In an effort to fully stamp out TFA in the Wasatch, the PPPC staff has created this logo to let tourists know that they can keep their TFA at places like Boyne Highlands or Hunter Mtn;

Friends don’t let Friends breath TFA!

Here at the PPPC we say “Don’t let Friends breath TFA! Go touring instead!”

In the future hopefully this logo will proudly denote resorts that are 100% TFA FREE!(Though we will continue holding our breath as companies like VAIL LOVE breathing TFA ALL DAY)

So, gentle reader, be warned the next time you are feeling nauseous, light headed, and really fucking annoyed at the local hill; you are breathing in WAY to much TFA!

Keep touring!

The Editor,

PPPC

12. February 2019 · Comments Off on I guess the skiing is pretty good this year…… · Categories: Blatant Utah tourism propaganda, Enduro as fucking fuck!, Here comes the fuck weather!, Real mtn life, ski touring, Utah Tourism
Skin car!

Yes, that is a skin track going over a car at Alta Central.

The editor,

PPPC

07. November 2018 · Comments Off on New Emoji decided upon by Ski Utah for Wasatch Winters; BREAKING NEWS!! · Categories: #usedtosnowsatchmtns, Blatant Utah tourism propaganda, Enduro as fucking fuck!, no snow in Ut, Real mtn life, where is the fuck weather?, winter is dead

Late Breaking News as PPPC VERIFIES that SKI Utah has indeed selected a new social media emoji to signify Wasatch winters.

AND HERE IT IS!;

Now everyone can say “Shitty Wasatch Winter” without actually swearing……

Get ready to burn some skis people!

The Editor,

PPPC

Even Though it was promised at least 6 months ago; The Old Man Benton Rain Calendar 2017/18 roll up is finally here!

Of course The OMB is not a trained meteorologist but in this time of heightened awareness of climate change/global warming, he feels his caustic opinion on how ski season is now a joke because it is 60f most of February is a needed resource to cut through ski resort marketing bullshit(like when Vail resorts has the “How Deep is it ” banner up on the Park city homepage a week after it actually last snowed and any trace of anything resembling pow has been packed into blue ice by soft tourists skiing sideways on triple rocker skis that are 190mm under foot…).

But enough complaining about the sorry excuse that now passes for winter here in the Wasatch and ONTO THE ROLL UP!!!!

Drum roll please……..In the 2017/18 season here in the Wasatch, it rained 18 days last season when it should have been snowing!

This comment from The OMB in early April/2018 sums it up pretty well; “Pretty sure I saw a PCMR ski Patrol this morning flicking rocks off Home Run with a Hockey Stick!”

Damn, can this situation be topped in 2019?

Only time will tell and do not forget that starting 11/18, the Rain calendar goes live and all the fun starts anew!!

Wow, I cant wait….

Get em tuned and burn a few if the snow is late!

The Editor/PPPC

P.S., gentle reader, here is a shot of the current snowpack here in PC;

10. October 2018 · Comments Off on Winter training progress; 2018/Don’t call it a comeback! · Categories: Blatant Utah tourism propaganda, Here comes the fuck weather!, instagram fitness ho's, Wasatch Citizens Series

Holy WOW! Winter is almost here and that means race season is less than 2 months away!

Luckily high level Nordic training has been well underway here at Pedal-n-Pole world headquarters based in Park City, Utah. Big changes have occurred in the training program as a new head coach has been hired for the 2018/19 campaign.

Fans of the PPPC might recognize this guy;

Coach Old Man Benton!

He has big plans for this season and started me off on a full ketogenic diet because that is what most instagram fitness ho’s are currently pushing and the results have been nothing less than astounding!

See for yourself as this is a before shot of me doing some interval training this spring pre Coach OMB;

I didn’t have to wait long for drastic results as this shot was taken at a altitude camp in August;

The gains are pretty obvious!

Fast forward another couple months and WOW;

Ripped and ready to SHRED!

With Coach OMB On Board; It is definitely going to be a standout season here at the PPPC!

See you at the the races,

The Editor/PPPC

24. March 2018 · Comments Off on Coming Soon! OMB Season Roll UP! · Categories: Blatant Utah tourism propaganda

When this guy rants;
1234710_10203333492407883_1142495442_n

People listen!!

COMING AS SOON AS THE RESORTS CLOSE DOWN; Old Man Bentons Wasatch Winter Rain Calendar Wrap Up 2018!!

groe

Fuck yeah we know who has the Greatest Rain On Earth!

And soon you will know EXACTLY how many days it rained(when it shold have snowed) in 2018!

The Editor,

PPPC

OH SHIT!

27657630_1325961547508844_8160578811326190394_n

THE Mark White.

Skin side down people and keep em in one piece!

The Editor,

PPPC